The Dark Feminine 12 Week Challenge

12 Weeks of Embracing the Darker Side of the Divine Feminine (18+ Only)

With everyone saying that this is going to be their Villain Era and my affinity for promoting the divine feminine I feel it's the perfect segue to a conversation about the darker side (and personally my favorite part) of the divine feminine. Before I begin I want to drop the STRONG reminder that the divine masculine and divine feminine are not gendered but merely opposing forces that compliment one another. We all have both. If you want to read more about the divine feminine check out my blog post: https://contactwitchywhims.wixsite.com/witchywhims/post/witchcraft-and-the-divine-feminine

This post is a 12 Week Challenge for those who wish to connect to this piece of spiritual energy. I am not going to lie for many of us this can be a challenging task, especially for the caregiving/empathic type. The dark feminine asks us to be selfish, to learn to take care of our needs before others.

Hashtag for challenge: #witchywhimsdarkfeminine2022

Week 1: Identifying Your Goals

Before anything, one must start with identifying what they feel they need from this experience and what they want to get out of this experience. Embracing the dark feminine can be many things to many people. Let’s start with a little bit about what the darker side of feminine energy.

Dark Feminine Energy involves direct interaction with your shadow self. If you are not familiar with shadow work then this term might be fairly new to you. Your shadow self incorporates the parts of yourself that you have consciously and subconsciously suppressed. Here are five pieces of dark feminine energy.

1 - The dark feminine is driven by the strive for independence. It asks us to face the shackles that hold us back the most from our ultimate goal and rip them to shreds regardless of the scenario. For example, toxic friends/partner, you kick them out of your life and you make sure you tell them the harm they’ve caused. You don’t just look for independence, you claim it.

2 - The Warrior is often associated with the divine masculine, however, the divine feminine warrior asks us to use our intuition and emotional powers. The pen is mightier than the sword, kind of warfare definitely comes into play, but the dark feminine does not turn away from battle when the fight worsens.

3 - The shadow self is incorporated in the dark feminine through the mysterious. The dark feminine does not only ask us to look into the dark but it asks us to hide in it. You become drawn to the shadows.

4 - Death also plays a role in the dark feminine. Think of the death card in tarot. Death does not necessarily mean the physical loss of life but rather the ending of something. For example, the end of partnership, the end of a job, graduating college etc. But where there is an end a new beginning is sure to follow. The dark feminine asks us to take control of this ending and start the life we want.

5 - Finally the dark feminine incorporates the role of the seductress. Now this does not always have to be sexual/romantic (although it can be) the seductress is about the skill of litigation, enchantment, and temptation. Our ability to persuade is strong and the dark feminine asks us to embrace it.

The weekly challenges are going to dabble in all five pieces of dark feminine power, seeing as they usually end up intertwining in one way or another. However, you can choose a piece you’d like to embrace the most, or that you’d like to take the most out of. You can also use these energies and direct them to one particular area in your life (spiritual or physical) where you’d like to see improvement and growth.

Week 2: Create some inspiration for yourself and prepare your environment.

The first week is all about preparation and creating inspiration to keep yourself motivated. Personally I redecorated my phone with dark feminine aesthetics just to keep me in the mood every day. You can also create a playlist, a vision board, Pinterest board, or a new fashion style for yourself. The dark feminine aesthetic incorporates colors like crimson and black. Black in color magick is a fierce and strong protector which is a great representation for the nurturing aspects of the divine feminine energy combined with the warrior aspects. Crimson is a color of passion and blood, the power that flows through yourself.

I will create some links for ones I’ve made for inspiration. Here:

• Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/14XEG9lHkM1szupzeY3cYG?si=yTGN9COATRamIsgd1I9QLQ

• Pinterest: https://pin.it/feJhv1l

In addition to creating inspiration, this first week also involves preparation. If you live in a home environment that allows you space to grow then you have more flexibility with these tasks, if you are still trapped in a situation due to unforeseen or difficult circumstances this may be harder, but I still encourage you to do the challenge within yourself for yourself. When embarking on this challenge I talked to those closest with me, let them know I was going to be making some big changes and decisions and it may seem fast, but that I need to grow. Those closest have stayed by me every time I’ve done this. (Although I’ve never done it in such an organized manner)

Week 3: Facing Your Trauma

That’s right we are starting off strong and diving straight into the hard stuff: the trauma. In Witchcraft energy can be negative and positive while witchcraft is a neutral force that allows you to control and manipulate this energy. Dark Feminine Energy has both negative and positive aspects but as an embracer of this energy you will learn to manipulate and control. In order to control, you must conquer so we are starting off with facing your trauma.

During this week you will be identifying recurring and last instances of trauma. Anything can be trauma for someone, because we all face different events and pains differently. What broke me may have been easy for you, and what broke you may have been easy for me. There are different types of traumas and many of us have experienced trauma without realizing.

Some traumas you may have faced (Trigger Warnings for whole list)

1. Sexual Abuse

2. Domestic Violence or Intimate Partner Violence

3. Religious Trauma

4. Racism, Oppression, and Discrimination

5. Bullying

6. War

7. Car accidents

8. Loss

There are many different traumas one may have experienced in life and these are just a few. During this week you are called to identify these traumas and aim to analyze them.

1. What is the trauma you’ve experienced?

2. Have you made any progress on healing?

3. What are some people in your life that played a role in your tauma? Are they still in your life?

4. What effects has this trauma had on you?

For me week 3 will involve analyzing my trauma through shadow work but all you have to do is identify what caused it and who played a role in it. Everything else will come later. (We all move at our own pace do not force yourself)

Week 4: Cutting Chords and Building Barriers

After taking a deeper look into your trauma you may realize that some people that are still in your life today played some contributing factor. Were they slow to stand by / believe you? Have they been discriminatory towards you or used slurs that you originally tried to look past? Have they exhibited toxic behaviors? This week is about putting up barriers between yourself and these people and laying the foundations to possibly cut chords. This is a basic barrier and not a complete separation (this will come later).

Week 5: Self-Affirmations

Pick five qualities you would like to exhibit in yourself and affirm that you have them or are working towards them. Tell yourself that you are attractive, you are smart, you are talented, you are unique. This week involves surrounding yourself in positive energy (which is why we put up barriers in the previous week between us and toxicity).

Remember life is short, the 9-5 job is made for capitalism not for skill, clothes are made to fit you you are not made to fit clothes, and everyone has their own baggage so don’t be ashamed of the skeletons in your closet.

Exercise to try: Every day when you wake up and every night before bed write down in a journal or look in mirror and go through your self-affirmations.

Exercise to try: Unfollow people on social media who make you think poorly of yourself. For example, I unfollowed all the women and who I compared myself to and followed positive quotes based accounts. Unfollow sad vibes accounts (I know for us who suffer from depression the depression can be comforting but we’re dropping depression off in a locked box and throwing away the key. We are drowning in the knowledge that we are better than we think.

Week 6: Self - Acceptance

Now it’s time to accept that the affirmations you have created for yourself are true. If you have to continue your affirmation exercises for self-assurance go for it. However, we want to work to transition our thinking from this is what I dream for myself to this is who I already am.

Week 7: The Selfish Act

Do something for yourself every day. Whether it be taking 30 minutes locked away in your room without talking to anybody, taking a bath every night, or making time from one of your hobbies. The goal is to do this all 7 days but the dark feminine demands that you do this at least once.

Maybe you don’t normally go out because of responsibilities in the home, take night off and go dancing, go to a movie, or maybe just relax in a park by yourself.

Maybe you have been faced with lots of religious trauma, counteract it with reclamation. Masturbation, sex, witchcraft, etc.

Week 8: Who Am I Now?

How much have you changed over the last 8 weeks? Do you like the changes you’ve seen? Would you like to make more? During this week I ask you to get to know the new you and fall inlove with them. Take yourself out on a date alone, buy yourself some new clothes for the new you, or just spoil yourself with some time to meditate, relax, or sleep in. Treat yourself the best way you possibly can and remember you deserve the best.

Week 9: Badass Energy

This week is the week of the snap backs and spiteful energy we all have deep down inside of us. Someone tells you they don’t care about you, say I never thought you did. Come back stronger and better. You are independent and no one can break you.

Week 10: Cut off the toxics.

You remember those toxic people that you created barriers between time to cut the chord. Now depending on your situation this may look different for everyone. For example, some may be fiscally dependent on those toxic people in your life. You are not expected to completely remove yourself in just one week. This is about cutting your emotional ties. Your empathic tendencies, your drive to come to the rescue for them, or your constant effort to fix their problems. Try to stop as much as you safely can. It’s time for us to stop giving all these pieces of us to people who never give back.

Week 11: Conquer Your Trauma.

No, you probably won’t completely heal from your trauma in one week (I know I haven’t) however this week you will begin to fully conquer your trauma. Learn methods to handle flashbacks, find coping mechanisms for your triggers, and even face one of your fears. (Personally I went back to the setting of my trauma and told myself that it was over and I am safe and strong) Two other ideas I recommend are diving into shadow work and signing up (if you haven’t already) for therapy or counseling that you may need to help with this step.

Week 12: Liberation

You are a free and powerful individual. You’ve learned to care for yourself, cut off toxic people, and you’ve built up the strength to start working on the traumas that haunt you.

Now it’s time to embrace the new found parts of yourself. Here are some things you can try.

1. Sexual Liberation through sex/masturbation

2. Look for new friends that respect you

3. Lead a march for social justice

4. Identify a new life path and start making strides toward it

5. Take a breather if you need.